Sunday, October 19, 2014
My meeting with the soccer club meeting.by Navroop Gill as a reporter
I had an experience with going to a soccer team meeting for the boys soccer which I heard from my friend that it would be right after lunch. So as I was going to the meeting I saw my friend phillip come also and I asked me if the meeting was in the small gym and phillip said I think so and then my friend Anthony came and asked us if the meeting was in the small gym and we said yes and as we went into the small gym there there werew groups of grade 10 11 and 12s there and no grade 8s so we just sat down on the bench and then a minute later some teacher came in and told us about the team that one team would be grade 8 9 10 11 and 12s for one team so us were just like what!!!!! and then he told us that the tryouts will be on the grass field and that there will be a signup sheet when you get there and that it would be at 3:15 and that we should be there at 3:00 then he said that everybody could leave thank you for listening and all then we left. And I would suggest that anybody really who likes sports doesn't have to really have to be soccer he just told us to tryout and have fun even if you have never played before so I would recommend this to anyone just to tryout and have fun at the tryouts even if youre not good I would say that for all the guys who like sportseven if youre not even good at this particular sport because you will probably maybe even be good at in the first try. My friends also decided not to tryout for the team because they felt like they wouldn't have a chance of making it so I think that this sport team is great but they should make teams of one grade 8 team 9 10 11 and 12so that every body would have a fair chance of making the team.
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Hi Navroop,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Jasper, you may know me.
First of all, I liked how you completed your objectives of your "Reporter's Report". You told us about the five W's; What (Soccer), Who (You and you friends), When (3:00), Where (Small gym) and Why (Fun!). You tried to get us to join too, but you come up a bit short. You could add some more description of the posivite points of the Soccer Team , so more people would be interested, but overall it was still great. One thing you can work on is to not write as you would say in a conversation. For example, instead of "so us were just like what!!!!!", you could have wrote, "so we were shocked". However, your writing was very exciting and even though I don't play soccer, it was very fun to read!
Hi Navroop,
ReplyDeleteThis club sounds really interesting! I like how you included where and when the club begins. I think you can add some punctuation because some sentences were a bit confusing to understand. There were also a few run-ons. I really like how you suggested that anybody could try out for the team, even if they are not the best at sports!